Strawberry Heartbreak
by JenKristo
Summary: After L’s death, Light becomes the most powerful man alive, and the loneliest. L is offered a second chance with one condition... Interfere with Kira and die. Will the condition be broken when Light, in turn, interferes with L? Light x L slash.
1. Restless in Heaven

Strawberry Heartbreak

Part 1

L knelt in the clouds, furiously digging through the white fluff. He knew he could reach Earth if he kept it up, he knew from glimpses he had seen on breezy days that Earth was below him; that Kira was down there with the helpless world.

"It's not every day that you see someone as discontented as you are with heaven," said a voice behind him. L turned around and frowned at the Shinigami-looking being with flesh like bubble bath foam.

"Who are you?" L asked.

"I'm a Judge. Judges are the caretakers of the departed. It's our job to send souls to heaven or hell, among other duties such as keeping you comfortable." The Judge's blue eyes blinked at him gently. "You don't have to stay in this part of Heaven. It's a vast place with many settings. Wouldn't you like to see your old home, the one you destroyed as a child? You could find your family."

"My family wouldn't want to see me."

"What about your friends? Near and Mello have asked about you."

L felt a lump in his throat, "They're here? Oh God, I didn't know they had died. I apologize for my rudeness for being unhappy here, but I can't just relax while the world is raped of its freedom."

The eggshell-toned creature laid a hand on L's shoulder. "I see it really has come to this."

"Come to what?"

"There is a gift we give to a select few who deserve it, a gift for those who are dissatisfied here. It's designed so that souls can be happier when they die the second time and will enjoy heaven when they are returned there. If you choose, I can have you sent back."

"You mean reincarnation?"

"This is different, actually. You're returned to the age that you were when you died, and you retain the memories of heaven and your previous life. You'll simply look different so that no one recognizes you. I suppose lightening your hair and giving you a freckle or two would suffice. How's that sound?"

L looked at his bare feet, "That sounds like a plan."

"Fantastic! There's just one rule you need to obey. You cannot interfere with the circumstances of your old life. This means for you, no detective work and absolutely no meddling in the affairs of Kira."

"That makes no sense, Judge. How is a person supposed to find contentment by returning if they can't complete unfinished business? That rule defeats the purpose."

The Judge looked stumped. "I guess it doesn't make sense, but it's necessary. If people discovered someone came back to life, there'd be a global panic. People would go mad, and surely tear you apart with questions and publicity. You'd probably be murdered by religious fanatics."

L shuddered. "I see. I agree with that."

The Judge looked delighted. "I'm so glad! Oh, just so you know, we'll kill you if you break the rule."

L nibbled at his fingernail, "A heart attack, I assume?"

"Actually, Shinigami specialize in heart attacks and Judges specialize in suffocation. You'll have an asthma attack whenever you get close to breaking the rule, and it will be fatal if the rule is completely broken.

L nodded. "I accept your invitation."

Meanwhile…

_Why is it so hard to do something as simple as being content? I ask myself this every day now, as my life deteriorates in my increasing success. I am Kira, I am god, and I am miserable. As time separates me from my greatest threat, I miss him more each day. _

Light leaned back in his seat, enjoying the rare moment of silence as the limo drove through Tokyo. He was glad to be out of the meeting, away from the servants of Kira. There were now nine subordinates who, through the years, discovered their own Death Notes and came forward to submit to the law of the original Kira, whose identity remained unknown. It was easy to play the role of the communicator, the simple messenger who gave word from his God to the followers. It was a safe place to be.

From the startling number of Death Notes discovered on Earth, Light wondered if the Shinigami world was playing a role on behalf of his mission. Conversely he worried that the real Gods of Death had a plan above his comprehension, a mission of their own to strike him down. Such thoughts were necessary to preserve safety. A thing Light had learned is that one could never worry too much.

He glanced out the window at the buildings passing by when something in a store window caught his eye. His heart jumped into his throat and he cried out to the limousine driver.

"Rotari, pull over quickly!"

Rotari slammed on the break and pulled over to the side of the road where Light quickly opened the door and climbed out. A robust man stepped from the limo's passenger seat and began to follow Light.

Light turned to his body guard, "I'll be fine, Sako. Stay here."

"Mr. Yagami, Sir, it's dangerous."

"Insolents!" yelled Light in an irritated outburst. Without another word, Sako stepped back into the limo.

Light walked to the front of a Tea and Pastry Shop and stared through the glass at a sight he hadn't seen in nearly a decade. At a two seated table sat a young man wearing a hat, whose back was thoroughly hunched. With his shoes disregarded on the floor, his feet were perched on the edge of his chair with his toes wrapped around the rim. The boy held open a newspaper, dangling it from a single corner as he sipped at a cup of tea.

Light whispered a single letter under his breath and burst into the pastry shop, marching over to the boy and pulling off his hat.

Light gaped at the boy, surprised to see that it was not who he had thought. There was an unnerving resemblance; an identically curved face, lips, and the wide, charismatic eyes Light had remembered so well. There were, however, obvious traits that vindicated him, chocolate-brown hair instead of black and a light dusting of freckles over his cheeks. Light was about to apologize and return the hat when the boy spoke out.

"Sorry, do I know you?"

Light raised an eyebrow. One had to be living in a third world country not to know who he was. People around the shop had turned away nervously or left all together, even the baker looked worried. Those words alone were enough to incriminate the boy.

"Who do you think I am? I'm Light Yagami, Lord Kira's spokesman! What's your name?"

"M-my name? It's uh…"

"It's what? State your name, _now_. Have you forgotten?"

By now the bakery was empty of all but the baker who had retreated to the back room.

"I have… amnesia sometimes, from an old head injury. I apologize," said the boy, "M-my name is… Li." The boy stood, his back remaining in a partial hunch and his toes pointed together. Light couldn't take any more of the enormous coincidence. He grabbed the boy's upper arm and began to drag him to the door.

"Please, I can't leave! I work here and my break's almost up."

Light scoffed and dragged him out the door. They paced quickly to the limo where Light shoved him in the back and shut the door behind them. "I know you're one of those L supporters. Let me tell you, he's long dead! You're breaking the holy law, behaving this, and it's my duty to take you in for questioning. You're a wannabe-L predecessor, aren't you?"

L opened his mouth to speak but instead gasped for breath. He fell to the limo floor, choking in a fit of asthma. Tears came to his eyes as his lungs were deprived of air.

_I didn't break the rule_, L thought, _Yagami was the one who barged over to me! I didn't start anything! It's not my fault. _

His trachea suddenly relaxed and air flooded into his burning lungs. He looked up and was startled to see Yagami holding his shoulders and bearing a look of complete dismay. The dismay was quickly replaced with embarrassment and indifference as he once again grabbed L's arm and pulled him to his seat.

L kept his eyes on the other, studying what time had done to him. He hadn't changed his hair in all the years, but his taste in clothing certainly had become expensive. Light's face was severe with adulthood, his sharp jaw held a stern mouth that went well with the piercing glare. L felt self-conscious under the man's gaze, realizing suddenly that he was an inferior by ten years. He felt his cheeks heat up with embarrassment.

"I see you're pretty lame if you can't handle a simple question without scaring yourself into an asthma attack. I can't have you dying in the interrogation room, so I suppose it would be better to question you in a comfortable setting."

L wanted to object to being called 'lame' but it was better that Yagami found him different than L's true self. The further from himself he was the less likely Yagami would want to kill him… _again_. He shrugged and stared out the window.

"I'd prefer someplace close; I'd like to get back to work some time today."

Yagami laughed, "I couldn't imagine L working at a pastry shop even with his full dental set of sweet teeth."

L scowled at his reflection in the window, "That makes sense then, since I'm _not _L." L spotted a familiar restaurant he had been to before and pointed to it. "Could we go there?"

The restaurant was bright with colors, a lavender bar on one end and a cluster of couches at the back. The couches were set in pairs of yellow and orange facing one another, with a glass coffee table in the center. L chose a set of couches and settled himself comfortably on a yellow couch as Light awkwardly sat on the orange.

"You certainly know how to pick a place," said Light as he glanced around the restaurant in its rainbow, paper-lantern glory, "This looks like a lounge for teenagers."

_I forgot how much of an adult you've become_, L thought, smiling to himself.

"The desserts here are wonderful."

Light rolled his eyes. "So Li, tell me about your connection to L. You obviously have one."

"I have no connection to L, nor do I understand why you think I work for him."

"I didn't say I thought you worked for him, I said there was a connection."

"Do we look alike? Perhaps we act alike? Being the spokesperson for Kira, I'm sure you know what happened to him, where he is and all. I'd love to hear that story."

Light smiled at the attempt at diverting his attention. "Nice try, Li, but everyone knows L was killed in the incident on sixteenth."

L tapped his head, "Amnesia, remember? I had an injury."

Light nodded exasperatedly, "The police department was bombed more than three years ago by a mob of Kira supporters. That's where the remaining task force and L were situated, and since then, none of them have been seen."

"Interesting story," said L as he pondered over the contradiction. He wondered how people believed him alive for seven years after his death. Could someone have been impersonating him? Another question he had was at what point had Yagami publicly announced his uniting with Kira? How, and what were the circumstances?

A young lady came and took their orders for drinks, Light insisting that they both order something alcoholic. The girl had looked at L with a sceptical eye, but under the circumstance of serving _Kira's own_, no one would be requiring ID. Light had suggested a spiked, strawberry smoothie for L, considering it was the sweetest drink besides pure juice.

"I don't usually drink," said L as he sipped the last of the third glass through a silly straw.

Light smiled at the plastered boy who was having trouble staying upright. He was sure that now he would pry something from this _Li's_ lips as the alcohol made him enthusiastically social.

"So how about this, Li, I'll ask a question and if you answer it, you can ask me a question."

Light's stomach unconsciously turned with butterflies at the boy's playful smile, his dark eyes brightening at the thought of a kind of 'game'.

"Ask away," he said to Light.

"Alright, my first question is, when did you first go to Wammy's foster home?"

"When I was six, I…" L's eyes widened and he looked at the other, terrified. He touched his throat but it didn't constrict.

Light smiled, "Looks like that's the connection. You met him there."

L sighed to himself, thinking how terribly close that was. The drinks were handicapping him, and any more could be fatal either from Kira or from godforsaken asthma.

"Now," said Light, "Ask me a question."

L let his gaze meet with Kira's, "How long do I have before you kill me?"

Light's stomach turned from butterflies to bats at the boy's fearful expression. He had been so consumed in finding out anything about his old rival that he hadn't considered the circumstance of Li. Obviously anyone being questioned in this situation would fear the worst.

L stood suddenly, his shoulders slumped more than usual, his mind swirling with blurred thoughts, "I swear to you, I have no intention of interfering with Kira. I beg you to let me live my life and I promise you'll never see me again. Goodbye, Light-kun."

L stumbled slightly as he went to the door, not looking behind him. Light stared at the door where he had left, the words of an intoxicated boy lingering in his mind.

_Light-kun?_

Tbc…

Author's Death Note: After DN Vol. 10, everything is my own design. I'm using artistic license regarding Shinigami and Judges. I don't care about inaccuracies nor should you feel obligated to inform me. Thanks for reading and don't forget to review!


	2. A Tragic Dessert

Strawberry Heartbreak

Part 2

Light walked along the city street, the people on the sidewalk moving around him like fish to a shark. Paces behind him walked his guard, Sako, whose eyes were peeled for threats.

_Light-kun, Light-kun, Light-kun… _

Only one person had ever called him by that name up until three days ago. This Li was no impersonator. He was _him_. No normal human would consider such a thing, but with Death Notes and Shinigami, who was to say this, whatever this was, couldn't happen? It _was _him, Light was sure.

Light stepped through the Bakery shop doors, much more gracefully then he had the last time. L was behind the counter, removing a fruit tart from the display case for a woman and her eager child. Light stayed by the door for a moment, watching curiously as L poked at the cash register. He looked sweeter than the desserts, standing there wearing an apron and a smile. He even had a set of barrettes, haphazardly holding back locks of his hair.

Light walked over casually, an upward curl on the corner of his mouth. L caught sight of him and his smile faded. "I'll lose my job if you keep dragging me away and scaring off the customers," said L under his breath.

"Nonsense," replied Light, "I've come to purchase." Light looked into the display case and pointed to the first thing he saw. "What's this?"

L looked at the item, a tube-shaped shell of fried dough containing white cream with pink shreds of something. "That's a rose cannoli. It has ricotta cheese frosting and shreds of rose petal."

"Rose is edible?"

"Quite edible."

Light looked around and pointed to a smooth, cream colored square topped with a flower of strawberry frosting and a single slice of strawberry. "What's this?"

L lifted his gaze and met Light's. "That's a creation of my own. Vanilla icing and strawberry on the outside, with layers of black-raspberry marmalade and grapefruit cake on the inside."

"A sweet dwelling for a bitter interior," observed Light, "What a tragic dessert."

L leaned forward, removing some space between them. "I call it the Strawberry Heartbreak."

The baker stepped over to them, smiling nervously. "Li, one of the girls checked in early so you can leave now, if you like."

Light smirked. "That means I can take you to lunch, correct?"

L sighed, annoyed with his employer. If there was anything he wanted to avoid, it was another meeting with Kira. And yet, Kira was a mystery, like the detective cases in the past. Breaking Yagami would be like all his past years spent thinking enough to cause aneurisms in the brains of the average. There was that intrigue of mysteries that caused his mind to tremble, but also something else in him, the piece of him that was looking for something more, something absurd, illogical, and devastatingly desired. This part of him was an undiscovered puzzle piece, a virgin emotion yet to be indulged upon. And so he agreed to lunch.

The restaurant Yagami had chosen was uncomfortably modern for L's taste, like a luxurious Panera Bread for the wealthy, with a dark interior and a wall of slate tiles bearing a waterfall. The hostess led them to a table by a window that looked down upon the city from many stories above. L knew this was no place to remove his shoes, but the agitation of keeping his feet on the floor was too unbearable to consider, so off went the sneakers and up went the feet.

"So Li, could we exchange questions again? Perhaps a sober version would be interesting. There are serious things I'd like to know about you. I want you to be honest and I'll be honest in return."

L's mind was screaming 'no' and 'run,' but the mystery piece of him came forward and agreed. "May I go first?" Light nodded and L continued. "Why is it that you want to know about me so much?"

"I want to understand you. You baffle me and I want to know what's inside." L raised an eyebrow. Time and status certainly had boosted Yagami's confidence. The Light he knew would have never been so open, or perhaps he was just being tactful.

Light looked off to the side, choosing carefully from the immense list of questions in his mind.

"Why do you sit the way you do?"

L shifted a little and looked away. "It's a dreary story."

"I'm fine with dreary."

L sighed. "My family was not a wealthy one, nor were we lucky. As a child I lived in a car with my parents and older sister. When I was a year old my sister forgot to roll up the windows while we were gone, and it rained inside. The carpet was ruined and so my father tore it out. I didn't feel like putting my feet on the cold metal so I slept with them up on the seat. Even after life improved, I was always uncomfortable with my feet on the ground."

Light loosened his jaw which had tightened through the story. "I apologize for asking such a question."

L shrugged. "You didn't know. Now for my question, how did you come to work for Kira?"

"I just began to realize that Kira was doing good for the world. I don't regret leaving the task force to join Kira."

L nodded and Light asked his question. "Why do you love sweets so much?"

"Because they taste the best. Now answer this; do you think L and the task force would have survived if you had stayed with them, or would you have been killed with them in the incident on Sixteenth Street?

"I would have been killed with them."

"If so, would Kira have lived on?"

"Why would my death affect Kira?"

"Answer the question, Light-kun. Would Kira live on? If I am who you think I am then there's no point in lying. Besides, I thought we were being truthful."

Light and L stared at one another emotionlessly, yet feelings filled them to the brim.

"If you are who I think you are," said Light, "then you already know the answer. Now answer my question, how did you come to Wammy's?"

"I burned my father alive."

Light's eyes widened but he didn't speak.

L clenched at his napkin, his logic breaking down like cotton candy on wet lips. He wondered again how that part of him had let such a secret slip from his mouth. Nobody, not even Watari knew about his father. "One evening, my mother took my sister job hunting. I was left in the car with my father, who spent his small earnings on alcohol. I was playing solitaire by candle light when he came onto me. I didn't understand what he was doing at that age, but looking back I better understand why he was pulling at my clothes. The concept was not for a child that age but I knew that something wasn't right, that there was an eight percent chance I'd come out unharmed. When he climbed onto me, I struck him with the closest thing, the candle. I didn't realize that he had spilt his drink on himself and in seconds he was in flames. He left the car screaming, but not before the car had caught fire itself. I ran from it that night, and after a journey, Watari rescued me from a bad foster home. I'll never be able to thank him enough for not finding my mother. Even after _death _I was too afraid to see her."

It took everything Light had not to toss the table aside and embrace the other. He couldn't take waiting and so he blurted out another question.

"How did this happen, L? How are you here, alive?"

L opened his mouth and his throat tightened. He stood from the table in a rush, knocking water glasses and silverware to the floor as he ran. It seemed ages as Light watched the items fall from the table, a spoon in particular falling as if it was the same one from a decade-old mistake. Light chased him down the stairwell and onto the sidewalk. He turned quickly, running into the street before Light could stop him. Light's eyes widened as tires screeched, cars swerving out of the way and rear-ending one another as L dashed to the other side and down an alley.

In the alley, air filled his lungs once more. With the air appeared the foam-fleshed Judge with blue eyes and another with greyish skin.

"You broke the rule, L," said the bubbly Judge, "I'm sorry but we need to take you back."

L fell to his knees. "Please let me stay, just a while longer. I need to talk to him just a bit more. I need… something."

"What do you need so desperately from him? What is it that prevents your happiness in heaven?"

"I'm going to find out," said L as he looked down. He raised his eyes and the Judges were gone, instead stood Light Yagami.

"What do you want from me?" L said as he stood.

"A thousand years of servitude to you wouldn't get me what I want."

"And what is that?"

"Forgiveness."

L smiled, but not warmly. "You're right, Light-kun. A thousand years would not suffice."

"Still, I regret what I did more than anything in my life."

L grabbed Light's collar, jerking him into a rough kiss. Light felt a fire ignite in him and he pressed L against the brick wall, pushing his lips tighter to L's. One hand slipped through the younger's hair, the other hand pressing against his cheek. Wetness touched Light's palm and he parted from L's kiss.

"You're crying."

"…I'm confused," replied L as he wiped his face with the sleeve of his shirt. Light waited, afraid to hear the inevitable. "Part of me, most of me, hates you for what you've done. You _killed _me, Light-kun, you stopped my heart in every sense. But now I find myself alive again, my heart beating for you as if you deserve it." By now L could not meet Light's gaze. Instead he buried his face into Light's clothes, his shaking hands clenched around the fabric. "How can I love what I should be afraid of? Tell me, Light."

Light wrapped his arms around the other, pressing his nose into L's soft hair. "I don't know how. All I know is having you here is far from what I deserve. Maybe I'm selfish, but it feels so good to have you back. Tell me this can last."

"It can't. I'm sorry, Light-kun. Now that you know it's me, I have to go."

L leaned up and pressed another kiss to Light's mouth. He pulled away and waited for the Judges to take him.

The Judges stood nearby, covered by invisibility and silence. The blue-eyed Judge glanced at the grey Judge. "This is terrible, Sir."

The grey Judge nodded. "I've never been a Kira fan, but this is awfully tragic."

"Do you think we could, you know, give them a break, Sir?"

The grey Judge paused, considering the preposterous. "I can't simply break the rule out of affection. We've all loved humans and we've never bent the rules for them. I'll postpone the reaping, but eventually L will have to die."

Time passed and L and Light waited. After what seemed like ages, L heard a whisper in his ear. '_Twenty-four hours_.'

"What's happening?" asked Light.

"We've been given a day."

Tbc…

Author's Death Note: L's history was my favourite part to write.


	3. 24 Hours Begin

Strawberry Heartbreak

Part 3

"We've been given a day," said L quietly.

They stood in silence, twenty four hours lingering in their minds. It was not enough, but that much time, like any time was precious.

"We don't have forever," said L, "so while I'm with you I want you to hear my advice. You obviously don't have to take it since I'll be _leaving_, but I'm begging you just to listen to me." L looked at Light a bit apprehensively, waiting for a reaction.

Light rested a finger on L's lower lip, sliding it across the moistened skin. "I can't just cherish these lips of yours; I have to respect what comes out of them. I can't only love you for the small talk; I have to love what you stand for because _that _is who you are."

L smiled into Light's finger, kissing it with the slightest hint of seduction. "I believe we both stand for justice," replied L, "but our views of it differ to a degree. I understand what you're trying to do to this world. You want it to be safe and so you've made it such. The difference, I fear, is that you've achieved this through force and fear rather than enlightenment and respect."

"How then, do I enlighten the people and gain their respect?"

"To be enlightened, they must understand their crimes and why they are being punished. Do not charge them if you can't explain it. Not just you, but all of the subordinates who work for the cause."

"And respect?"

"The inevitable conclusion to every dictator is their struggle to remain in power. To gain respect, you must give power away. I suggest creating a large agency of lawyers and regular citizens to help decide who Kira should bring justice upon. People then will focus on the morality of their crime rather than its personal impact on Kira. This will make citizens respect not only your authority but that of the entire government system."

Light watched L, fascinated. "You should have found the Death Note rather than me."

L laughed out loud, a genuine smile finally coming to his face since his second life began. He took Light's hand and they made their way from the alley.

"Now that I've lectured you," said L with a smirk, "it's your turn to choose what to do."

Light stayed silent as they walked down the street, his mind still on twenty four hours. This time tomorrow L would not be among the living. There were so many things he had imagined over the years in moments of peace and contemplation, so many 'what if's' that he'd have to choose carefully from. They found Light's limo and Light instructed Rotari without informing L of the location. Eventually they were there, the location surprising L completely.

Sweat gleamed on their bodies as the boys moved, their motions sweeping and their hearts racing, muscles aching with adrenaline. They exchanged friendly glances although both felt like the harder they pushed the deeper they'd know the other. The tennis court was beginning to turn orange as the sun fell behind the city buildings. They were forced to quit after the fourth game as the sky grew too dark to see, the two leaving satisfied with a tied number of wins.

"I want to see how you live, Light," said L as he slid a wet towel across the back of his neck, "What do you do with your friends?"

Light looked embarrassed at the words. "I honestly can't say I have _friends _per se. I'm too suspicious of everyone to have relationships. I let the Kira subordinates drag me out every once in a while just so I don't look like a recluse. It's not terribly interesting, they just want to go clubbing and get attention."

"I want to see. Where do they take you?"

"Usually the Lime, a place I own but I don't really take care of. It's usually the preferred spot for safety's sake, since most of the members are hard core Kira supporters. Please trust me when I say it's not interesting."

"Let's go anyway, even just for five minutes. I need to know _something _about the current you."

The drive through the city was a sparkle of lights and colors in the dark, the night livers coming out in their wild clothes and lining up at the doors of the clubs. They reached the Lime and Light led L past the crowd of people and past an overly friendly bouncer. It was black at first, but deeper inside L could see flashing lights and the DJ blasting music that could be heard outside. Keeping a tight hold on L's hand as they went through the crowd of dancing people, Light led L up a flight of stairs and past a few more large men who greeted Light warmly. The second level was a quarter of the size of the first, with an open view down of the dancers and the bar. The platform was nearly empty save a circle of red wine colored couches with a group of men in suits. Some and then all of them turned to see Light, a few gaping.

"Am I seeing correctly, guys? Looks like Mr. Yagami got himself in here without being dragged in by his heels. And who's this?"

L, who was staring over the balcony at a bar tender pouring a strawberry margarita, pulled himself into attention. The first thing he noticed was a face that looked particularly shocked to see him. The man stood and gaped like a fish.

"L? How…"

"That's what they keep telling me," said L with a smile.

"It honestly is a coincidence, Matsuda," said Light as he slid a hand around L's waist. "Li here is a new friend of mine."

L blushed furiously at the public display of affection. "Light, I'm going to go downstairs and get a drink."

"The waitress can bring one up for you."

"I'd really like to get it myself, thanks," L replied. Just for assurance, he kissed Light's cheek before escaping downstairs. Light sat on the couch, wondering if he should have followed L.

"I've never seen you bring a _boy _here," said a blonde man with a grin.

Light shrugged. "I like him."

"He _is _something," said another man with curly hair and arched eyebrows, "What got you hooked, Yagami? It can't be the sex. Not that it matters to Kira's main man, but he barely looks legal."

"Exactly!" said another, "It's not the sex because he's a virgin. It makes more sense since Light loves a challenge. Or did you already shag him? That little kiss he gave you was certainly affectionate."

The curly haired man snickered and Light did all he could to keep cool. The first thing he would do on Monday would be to strip these idiots of their Death Notes and find more mature subordinates. He looked over at Matsuda who had remained silent through the whole ordeal. He'd keep Matsuda.

"How's Misa?" Light asked Matsuda.

Matsuda smiled like a kid with candy, "She's wonderful as always. She doesn't like my Shinigami though. I think it has a crush on her because it won't leave her alone. I should probably switch with one of you guys. So seriously, Light, where's this Li from?"

"I met him in a bakery."

"So Yagami's got a sweet tooth!" said the curly haired man with a laugh.

Matsuda stood. "Give Mr. Yagami a break, Druno. Can't anyone besides me have a decent relationship? I'm going to the bathroom."

"Thanks for informing us all," laughed one of the guys as Matsuda headed downstairs. He passed the bathroom and stood beside L who was just getting his smoothie.

"I have to say something," he said to L, "You're getting really deep, being interested in Mr. Yagami. If it's the fame or money you're after, forget it because Light needs someone who wants him for himself. If that _is _the case for you, you'd better be ready for a long road because he's not one to open up easily. I know he's a nice guy inside but he's up to his neck in distrust. I don't even know if he trusts me completely. Even before when we were with the Japanese Police he didn't seem to trust me."

Matsuda certainly had grown up in the past years, L thought. He smiled at the other, touched by the outburst. "What a good friend you are, Matsuda. I'm leaving for… Italy tomorrow, so you take care of Light-kun for me, okay?"

L sipped his smoothie and left it at the bar, stepping up the stairs to grab Light and get out of the place.

"So where are we going?" said L when they had gotten into the limousine, "It's your turn to pick."

Light observed L, noticing the exhaustion he was trying to ignore. "Maybe we should rest for a while."

"But we don't have a lot of time."

"Still, I think you'll enjoy it more if you're rested."

L agreed and Light ordered Rotari to head towards his apartment.

They drove for a while in a comfortable silence when Light suddenly pulled off his seatbelt. He left his seat and moved in front of L, kneeling on the floor.

"Light? What's wrong?"

"Give me your feet."

L tilted his head. "What?"

"Your feet. Stretch your legs out and give them to me." L made a face at the funny request, but obeyed nonetheless. Light cracked his knuckles and took hold of the right foot.

"I don't know what you're up to, Light, but…" L stopped mid sentence as he realized what was happening. Light looked down on his work, his hair hanging over his eyes. He moved his hand across the arch of L's foot, pressing his strong fingers over the bottom and stretching out his toes. His hands were firm but gentle as he worked at the muscles, pressing a finger in between each toe. L whimpered. It wasn't painful, because it wasn't the feeling that hurt him. Memories he had long forgotten bubbled to the surface, the day in the stairwell when he had, as a peaceful gesture, massaged Light's feet. It must have only been hours before his death.

"Please, Light, you don't have to," said L in a shaky whisper.

Light put down L's foot and lifted the other, working at the stiff muscles and ignoring L's comment. The aura in the limo was growing dark.

Timidly, L repeated himself. "Light…"

"I have to do this, ok? Just please, let me."

Light still didn't look up, and L choked back a sob as he felt wet drops fall to his ankle from Light's eyes. Light Yagami, the epitome of power, success and strength was on his knees, weeping before L's eyes. This was Kira, L thought, Kira was just a human, one who felt emotion, rage, revenge… and now a profound and unfathomable grief. Light soon freed L's foot, leaning forward and wrapping his arms around L's leg.

"I'm sorry," he whispered into the soft denim.

Tbc… R&R!

Author's Death Note: Who fell for the tennis match? _You know_ you thought they were doing something else! Please, review! Reviews make me type faster.


	4. The L Note

Strawberry Heartbreak

Part 4

They stood side by side in the back of the crowded elevator ascending to Light's apartment. Light slipped his hand behind L and up his shirt, stroking the arch of his back. L bit his lip and held his breath as Light's hand slid lower, beneath his jeans and over the bare skin of his rear. A small sound escaped L's lips and a few of the people turned and gave him funny looks. Light smiled, staring ahead of him.

"So Li, what's your favourite song?" Light said as he gave L's rear a squeeze.

"Yipe!" L squeaked as his cheeks turned a brilliant shade of crimson.

"That isn't a song, Li," reprimanded Light, "As for me, I'd have to say 'Dani California' by the Chili Peppers."

L let out another whine as Light slid his hand to the side and caressed his hip. To no one's surprise, the elevator was empty by the time they reached the top floor. When all were gone, however, Light stopped his teasing and moved to twirl the younger boy's hair.

It made him nervous teasing L as he had, given the height of respect he held L in. The failure in L's battle against Kira had not in the least been intellectual; in truth it had been the fault of his heart which desperately wanted to give those around him the benefit of the doubt. Too many times L had let his guard down around Light, trusting all the filthy lies escaping from his mouth. The hope for friendship had blinded him even to the day of his death.

It wasn't as if he had found out _nothing _of L through all the years. He had spent time and a lotof money for a few secrets from L's past, traveling to Wammy's and meeting people who wished Light dead. One thing he had discovered were a great number of young souls who idolized L. Yes, there were those who loved him, but there was no intimacy in his past. No one really knew more of L than his achievements. Light knew this from his most treasured possession, a not-so-legally attained notebook that L had written in through his youth. Even with L's notebook, the answer to one of his biggest questions had been lost completely until now.

"L, what's your real name?" Light asked as he unlocked his apartment door.

L smiled. "I'd rather not say, really. It's not a name I like, nor is it one I've come accustomed to. If you must call me something other than L, you could use Ryuzaki.

Light smiled, "No, I like L."

Rain beat hard against the dark windows of Lights apartment as the boys stripped off one another's clothes. They fell to the closest surface to Light's front door, a suede couch in his living room. Light broke the kiss a moment to stare at L beneath him, noticing oddly how the lighting darkened his hair and paled his skin. It didn't matter either way, his eyes were the same dark underlined eyes that drove Light mad, even more so with their innocent eagerness. His lips were slightly parted, giving view of his pearly teeth and strawberry-sweet tongue. L wrapped his arms around Light's neck, pulling him back into the kiss. Light wasn't sure if it was instinctive for L to raise his knees the way he did when he sat, but either way it led to them wrapping around his hips.

L opened his eyes and grinned into their kiss. "Am I making Light Yagami blush? I never thought I'd see the day."

"You're doing a lot more than that," Light whispered as his flush deepened. He hoped it would make L blush or even laugh, and worried that he'd sounded like a pervert. To his relief L pulled him closer.

"Please, Yagami-kun."

The situation would have been awkward to most, but when the two greatest minds in the world try to make love for the first time, they need only logic to figure things out.

"I haven't exactly done this before," L whispered, "Are you as nervous as I?"

"I've only ever been with women, so you could say I'm a little nervous."

Nervous was the understatement of a decade, Light thought. Gender would have made no difference if it was someone else, but this was _L_. Light inadvertently recalled the notes from L's journal, words he had gone over time and again.

'_What is love?_' L had written in his notebook, '_I see it everywhere but it's beyond my grasp, like a mirage it is visible but never tangible. I wonder if love is hate's disguise. Feelings like love come only with those who wish for my death. Like a blood stain, hate stays bold, and like pain, hate is burning, consuming and passionate. For this I will love my enemies_.'

L whimpered slightly as they began, but he didn't resist at all. Light held him tighter as he moved, slowly and painstakingly breaking L's barriers. Light tried desperately to push the notebook's words from his mind, but it was in vain. The most painful words crept into his mind, the last entry before L's death.

'_I've never despised my enemies before. Those criminals who I chased were simply obstacles, never causes for emotional attachment. Kira, however, leaves my thoughts in flames. Aside from being my first intellectual equal, he is gifted with a social capacity that leaves me in the dust. It's like he's painting graffiti on my walls, leaving me in the same boat of other people caught up in his charm. I suppose the only thing I can take credit for is winning his unrivalled hate. His understanding of me is frightening, how he feeds on my weakness for friendship and taunts me with his faulty kindness. I can't help falling for it. I know from Light that love and hate are not such different emotions_.'

"Don't hate me," Light couldn't help but say through heavy breaths.

L's eyes widened. "Look at me, Yagami-kun," he said through his panting, "Look at me, here with you, and tell me I don'tlove you."

Light apologized for his doubts and thanked L for alleviating his mind. Soon after, they found themselves pressed together on the couch, L's face buried on Light's neck. Neither had ever felt so satisfied… or so exhausted.

L woke first, his eyes blinking in the dim morning light. It had stopped raining and everything seemed unearthly still.

"It's time," said a voice behind him. L looked towards the grey judge and then to Light to see if he had woken.

"He won't wake yet," said the Judge, "I'd like to speak with you."

"But you're so early."

The Judge shook its head. "Hear me, L. You know there are rules we Judges create for humans to keep their lives in order. The rule of those in their second life is not to meddle in the affairs of the past. If these second-life humans began revealing the structure of the after-life to others, it would become common knowledge to all humans. For reasons I cannot speak of, that common knowledge would destroy everything. Although you have contacted Yagami and broken the rule, your actions have not caused a global panic as was expected. Because of this I've developed a new approach."

L lay quietly, listening to the Judge's plan.

"So no one will recognize me, but I'll look the same?"

The grey Judge nodded. "You could hold a photo of you now and one from ten years ago, which look identical, and no one would connect the two. Same with your behaviour. Your dialect, voice, even your posture will not be recognized."

"I didn't know such things were possible."

"You'd be surprised how simple the human mind is in the hands of Gods. You do understand what you'll be_ losing _if you choose this option rather than death, correct?"

L looked back at Light, who was sleeping contently. "I'll do anything to preserve this."

Tbc…


	5. Meeting Again

Strawberry Heartbreak

Part 5

The grey Judge vanished through the wall of Light's apartment.

"He agreed," it said as it joined the bubbled Judge flying over the city.

"That's fantastic, Sir."

The grey Judge grunted. "This means a lot of work for us. We need to disconnect all witnesses' memory of the original L's physical appearance. That means tracking down everyone who's ever seen him and redirecting the brain's codes."

"Even Yagami?"

"_Especially _Yagami.

"What about L? We can't make him not recognize himself."

The grey Judge rolled its' eyes. "Of _course _not. L will have to lose all of his memories. He agreed to it himself. The Judges of History will invent a new past and memories of equal emotional value to L's previous life."

"I'm not sure I understand, Sir."

"That means L will remember a different past, but the events will lead to his personality being the same as it is now. It won't be terribly difficult since the soul has such a remarkable internal memory. Whatever happens, he'll be the same person."

The bubbled Judge gave up trying to understand. "Leave it to you, Sir."

"First comes first," said the grey Judge, "Take out the time piece and turn it back."

"How far, Sir?"

"Let's say, the Bakery meeting."

_Why is it so hard to do something as simple as being content?_

Light leaned back in his seat, enjoying the rare moment of silence as the limo drove through Tokyo. He was glad to be out of the meeting, away from the servants of Kira. It had been a night of tossing and turning, blurred dreams of love, angst and something involving twenty four hours whirling in his aching head. He shrugged off the dream, dismissing it as part of his paranoia.

'_I'm forgetting something_,' he thought to himself as he glanced out the window at the buildings passing by. '_What is it? What, what, what?_ _Something to do with Matsuda._'

A large wedding cake in the display case of a bakery caught his eye, sending back his memory. '_Misa! Oh shit, I forgot Matsuda and Misa's anniversary… again.'_

"Rotari, pull over quickly!"

Rotari slammed on the break and pulled over to the side of the road. A robust man stepped from the limo's passenger seat and began to follow Light.

Light turned to his body guard, "I'll be fine."

"Mr. Yagami, Sir, it's dangerous."

"I'll be _fine_, thank you," he repeated as he entered the bakery. He hadn't planned on buying an anniversary gift from a bakery shop, but then again he knew the couple loved sweets, especially Misa. He'd buy a giant box of… something. He stepped up to the front counter, staring confoundedly at the array of goods. He glanced up, hearing a man's yelling behind a closed door.

"El, I swear if you don't stop alphabetizing my desserts I'll throw you out! For the last time, organize them by price! Price, El, _not _alphabet!"

Light gaped. Who in hell was confident enough to go by the name 'L' in a Pro-Kira world? The answer stepped through the door, bowing to the man Light assumed was his employer. The boy stepped over to the counter, his back definably hunched and his jeans splotched with baking flower. He raised his eyes, dark and underlined, to meet Lights'.

"Can I help…"

He froze. The reaction was commonplace to Light, so he gave the boy time to register who he was addressing. The boy ran his fingers through jet-black hair, his smile slipping to a poker-face. "What can I get you?" he asked coldly.

"I'm afraid you've distracted me from the desserts. From the look on your face and that nick-name I heard you answer to, I'm deducing that you're anti-Kira. That's a dangerous position, especially for a young thing like your self. If you're trying to challenge Kira I can tell you you're no match."

"Did you come here to taunt people or purchase pastries?" said the boy with an innocent voice. Light growled internally at the impertinence but was cut off before he could speak. "Mr. Yagami, my name is spelled 'E-l,' not 'L', and it's my real name _not _a nick-name, so if you'd like to run it by Kira, I'll tell you my surname as well. The great coincidence here is that I, El, _am _strongly anti-Kira."

Light was baffled. He hadn't met a Kira critic in ages, much less such a straight-forward, hot headed, young and attractive one like this. He was sure he'd be angry if the boy denied his name and insisted his innocence, but this 'El' was too amusingly confident to be angry with.

"How about we leave Kira out for a minute and you take a walk with me? Its protocol that I question every Kira critic I meet. And I'm sure," he said, meeting L's gaze, "that you have plenty to lecture me about."

El smiled. "You bet I do."

End.

Author's Death Note: Many people feel the end doesn't need reviewing because your sweet reviews won't earn any new chapters, but I really, _really _want to know what you think of the story as a whole. Thank you for reading!


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